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Dr. Freud 
(alternate:) 
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Dr. Freud (David Lazar) 
Oh, it happened in Vienna, not so very long ago, When not too many folks were getting sick That a starving young physician tried to better his position By discovering what made his patients tick
 Oh, Dr. Freud, oh, Dr. Freud How I wish that you'd been otherwise employed For the set of circumstances sure enhances the finances Of the followers of Dr. Sigmund Freud 
He forgot about sclerosis, but invented the psychosis And a hundred ways that sex could be enjoyed He adopted as his credo, "Down repression, up libido" And that was the start of Dr. Sigmund Freud 
Now he analyzed the dreams of the teens and libertines And he substituted monologues for pills He drew crowds just like Wells Sadler, when along came Jung &
 Adler Who said, "By God, there's gold in them thar ills" 
They encountered no resistance when they served as Freud's
 assistants As with Ego and with Id, they deftly toyed And instead of toting bedpans, they bore analytic deadpans Those ambitious doctors, Adler, Jung, and Freud 
Now the big three have departed, not so the cult they started It's been carried on by many a goodly band And to trauma, shock, and more shock, someone went and added
 Rorshach Now the thing has got completely out of hand 
Now old men with double chinseys and a million would be Kinseys Will discuss it at the drop of a repression I wouldn't be complaining, but for all the dough I'm paying To lie on someone's couch and say confession