Its Funny What Lager Will Do - song lyrics 
American Old-time song lyrics from www.traditionalmusic.co.uk 
Its Funny What Lager Will Do. Sung by Leslie and Hardman. 
I awoke up this morning with a terrible head, I was nervous and I had the shakes, I had to use a shoe-horn to put on my hat, I imagined that I had the snakes. For I had been drinking a little too much, Which made me feel awfully blue, I'd given the world for a cocktail, It s funny what lager will do. 
Chorus. It will make a man fight, And stop out all night, Get arrested and get ten days, too, It will make a man stutter, And sleep in the gutter, It's funny what lager will do. 
Make him join the marines, Live all Winter on beans, And put him in a terrible stew, It will make him a bum, By the copper get run, It's funny what lager will do.-Chorus. 
It will make him eat clams, And have the jim-jams, And sometimes get him dubbed black and blue; It will make a man lazy. And drive him near crazy, It's funny what lager will do.-Chorus. 
It will put him in rags, Make him drain old beer kegs, And various other things do; And when he gets broke, All his clothes he will soak, It's funny what lager will do.-Chorus. 
, ' It will make him a fool, Get him stuck playing pool. And banged o'er the head with a cue; And if he is flush, It will soon make him lush. It's funny what lager will do.-Chorus. 
Make a man soon repent, When he ain't got a cent. You bet he'll feel awfully blue; Made a man in the gallery Spend all his week's salary, It's funny what lager will do.-Chorus. 
It will make a man stout, It knocked Sullivan out, Though he says the report is not true; It made the coachman skip off With Morrisania's fair daughter, It's funny what lager will do.-Chorus.