Never In The Wide, Wide World - song lyrics 
American Old-time song lyrics from www.traditionalmusic.co.uk 
Never in the Wide, Wide World. Copyright, 1887, by the Dockstader Publishing Co. Words by Edward F. Kidder. Music by W. S. Mullaly. 
Did you ever go to "Coney" that you didn't meet a crush? Never in the wide, wide world; When you try to borrow money is there anybody flush? Never in the wide, wide world. You toddle to your slumbers after weary hours of strife. Your pockets they are rummaged by your very anxious wife; But you couldn't find her pocket if you hunted all your life, Never in the wide, wide world. 
You think it isn't difficult for me to sing this song, Never in the wide, wide world; For I manufacture verses as I calmly go along, Never in the wide, wide world. We've got a worthy President as sharp as any knife. He seems to please the people and he leads a busy life; Do you think he'd be as popular if it wasn't for his wife? Never in the wide, wide world. 
The Britishers are clever, that no one can deny, Never in the wide, wide world; But they can't eclipse America no matter how they try, Never in the wide, wide world. We like the English people and we like the English beer, And we patronize the actors they are sending over here, But we don't believe the Thistle can beat the Volunteer, Never in the wide, wide world.