That's An Old Gag With Me - song lyrics 
American Old-time song lyrics from www.traditionalmusic.co.uk 
THAT'S AN OLD GAG WITH ME. Copyright, 1884, by Wm. A. Pond & Co Words by K d. Harrigan. Music by Dave Braham. 
I'm looking for something that's new, On my honor, I'm getting blasé; Of many tricks I know a few, And I'm willing to give them away. I heard an old story last night, No smile out of me, I could cry; The party took it for a slight, Oh, but what can I say in reply? 
Chorus. Oh, that's an old gag with me! oh, that's an old gag with me! Now tell something new, for goodness sake do; Oh, now give me a laugh, and I'll cotton to you, Oh that is so awfully blue, and that's an old gag with me. 
They say such a man has got wealth, Worth a million in bonds or in gold; Enjoying the best kind of health. It's a story that's currently told. Some day he sells out for a song, They give me the tip on the sly; He's making a bluff all along, Oh, but what can I say in reply? 
Chorus. Oh, that's an old gag with me! oh, that's an old gag with me! He must make a show to friend and to foe; For to make a big noise he must keep on the go, Oh, the tide will be high and be low, and that's an old gag with me. 
While walking down Broadway one day, Oh, I met with a handsome young man, So pleasant, so winning and gay, He said: "Major, you're down from Pennyann." He thought he would give me a steer, 'Gainst bunco, oh, my! he was fly; He asked me to come take a beer, Oh, but what can I say in reply? 
Chorus. Oh, that's an old gag with me! oh, that's an old gag with me! Now don't you forget the party you met; I am too old a sucker to catch in your net, When I'm left, oh, the day will be wet, and that's an old gag with me 
The ladies who go on the stage, And in seeking to reign as a star; They first make their beauty a rage, And the money is furnished by pa. While talent must step to the rear, Give way to an ambitious guy; Why is it that acting is queer? Oh, but what can I say in reply? 
Chorus. Oh, that's an old gag with me! oh, that's an old gag with me! Now work on the press, buy plenty of dress; Oh, have three or four scandals, that's all, nothing less, For you don't have to study or guess, and that's an old gag with me.