The Funny Little Fellow With The High, High Hat - song lyrics 
American Old-time song lyrics from www.traditionalmusic.co.uk 
THE FUNNY LITTLE FELLOW WITH THE HIGH, HIGH HAT. Copyright, 1890, by G. H. Kline. Composed for Miss Patti Rosa by Gustave H. Kline. 
How many sweethearts I have got is hard for me to tell; If I should some describe to you, perhaps you'd know them well; It keeps me busy counting all the presents that they bring; Although there's none of them my choice, I've got them on the string. 
Spoken-There's the 
Chorus. Funny little fellow with the high, high hat, And another little fellow with a cane. A big, fat man who walks like that, And a fellow with a title to his name, A Frenchman gay with his "Oui Monsieur," And an Englishman with "On are you, me boy A Dutchman mit his "Nix-come-a-rous," And a Mick named Pat Malloy. 
While going to church or driving out with handsome narry Brown, Oh, he is just the dearest boy, the sweetest man in town; While at the corners there they'll stand, to look they know not how, So, with a sigh and jealous eye, they tip their hats and bow. Spoken-Oh, this-Chorus. 
Now, by-and-by we'll married be, dear Harry and myself; ? I do not wish to die an old maid, or be laid on the shelf, But when at times I'm left alone, and Harry's gone away, I cannot help but think of all my beans of by-gone days. Spoken-Especially- Chorus.