Do As I Tell You - song lyrics 
American Old-time song lyrics from www.traditionalmusic.co.uk 
DO AS I TELL YOU. Written and Composed by Leslie Reod. 
I and a friend of mine, called Joe, When to a party a few nights ago; By Jove! it was a brilliant affair, And the first time I'd been there. He introduced me to them all. The dark, the fair, the short, the tall; And after we had finished tea. We both sat down, and he said to me: 
Chorus. "Do as I tell you, and you'll do right. Don't you be nervous or timid at night; I'll tackle one girl, you tackle two, And If I get a kiss back, so will you!" 
I took the tip he gave to me. We went in for a glorious spree; I kissed two sweet girls somehow, Then there was an awful row. Their young men both kicked up a fuss, And swore they'd kill the pair of us; Then my pal hit one in the eye, And shouted out as he let fly: 
Chorus. "Do as I tell you, and you'll do right, I knew that this would end in a fight; I'll tackle one chap, you tackle two. And if I get a black eye, so will you!" 
While I tackled two chaps, he settled one, I couldn't see in the game much fun; And soon to my dismay I found, That I was sprawling on the ground. But when at last the policeman came. The girls cried, "What a horrid shame!" Then my pal cracked a "copper's "head, Seized me by the arm and said: 
Chorus. "Do as I tell you, and you'll do right. Don't let the policemen take us to-night; There's one on the nob for the man in blue, Now if I get locked up, so will you!" 
At last the policemen collared us both. To go to the station I was awfully loth; And when morn before the beak, I found my voice extremely weak. And my pal, when brought into court, To speak to me in vain besought; But no good, try what dodge he may, So in dumb show contrived to say: 
Chorus. "Do as I tell you. and you'll do right. Don't you be nervous or you're In a plight; And don't you round on the man in blue, For if I get six months, so will you!"