Reuben And Cynthia - song lyrics 
American Old-time song lyrics from www.traditionalmusic.co.uk 
REUBEN AND CYNTHIA. Copyright, 1892, by T. B. Harms & Co. Words by Chas. H. Hoyt. Music arranged by Percy Gaunt. 
Reuben, Reuben, I've a notion If the men were sent away, Far beyond the stormy ocean, Female hearts would all he gay, Cynthia, Cynthia, I've been thinking If the men should take that trip, All the women in creation Right away would take that ship. 
Reuben, Reuben, I've been thinking What a strange thing it would be If all streams of drinking water All turned salty as the sea. Cynthia, Cynthia, I've been thinking, You can safely take my word, More than half the population Wouldn't know it had occurred. 
Reuben, Reuben, I've been thinking Will you tell me where or when Women will be forced to stop this-Doing things just like the men. Cynthia, Cynthia, I've been thinking, And can answer with dispatch, She must cease her mannish methods When she comes to strike a match. 
Reuben, Reuben, I've been thinking Why do people risk their gold Betting on the wicked races, Knowing they are bought and sold. Cynthia, Cynthia, I've been thinking, That is where the laugh comes in, Each man thinks that he has fixed it, So the horse he backs will win.