My Friend, The Major - song lyrics 
American Old-time song lyrics from www.traditionalmusic.co.uk 
MY FRIEND, THE MAJOR. Copyright, 1894, by Francis, Day & Hunter. Written and Composed by E. W. Rogers. 
You must know my friend, the major, quite the rage in New York town; In the West this gay old stager has procured a wide renown. Biggest liar, can't stand fire: never known to stand a drink, Sponges, lounges, mashes, dashes, at the ladies tips a wink; Boozes, snoozes, struts and cruises 'round the club till half-past two. Right turn, quick march, booh-oo-oo! 
Chorus. My friend, the major, is the idol of the fair, The ladies chaff, wink and smile, all admire his military style; My friend, the major, is a ladidadidoo, The men are all afraid when be toddles on parade with his boo-oo-oo. 
Know the major's always stony, always up to sundry pranks; Meets you and demands a pony, borrows it and gives no thanks. Billiard player, not one gayer, very thick at Baccarat; if he meets you, never treats you, gently bids you tralala. If you smite him, you can fight him, this is what he'll quickly do, Right turn, quick march, boo-oo-oo!- Chorus. 
What He's major of? I don't know if his company exists; Search, and then I'm sure you won't know, he's not in the army list. Sundry people, who can't keep all news they hear from day to day, Say this gorger was a forger, served his time up Sing Sing way, And by warder kept in order, he'd to march, big stones to hew, Right turn, quick march, boo-oo-oo.- Chorus.