How To Live On I 00 A Week - song lyrics 
American Old-time song lyrics from www.traditionalmusic.co.uk 
How to Live on $I.00 a Week. Copyright, 1893, by Chas. F. Pidgin. Words by Chas. F. Pidgin. Music by J. W. Wheeler. 
When your landlady comes for the rent. You must ask, you must ask if the mail has got in; You have heard that a letter's been sent By an Unc, by an uncle, 'tis chock full of tin; Then the price of her best room you ask; Would she not, would she not like to go to the play, Tho' it seemed an impossible task; She will let, she will let you alone for a day. 
Refrain. How to live on a dollar a week Is the question, is the question that agitates me. It takes friends and an ocean of cht-ek To exist, to exist on a small salary. If you've not got the money to pay, Why, of course, why, of course, you can't pay, and that's all; As a man must exist in some way, He must live, he must live without money at all. 
Chorus. Hundred cents, the expense, can you live on a dollar a week? Tell your plan, like a man. to that question an answer I seek. Hundred cents, the expense, can you live on a dollar a week? Tell your plan, like a man, to that question an answer I seek. 
When your wash lady comes for her cash, A new yarn, a new yam you must make up each week; You have learned that your bank's gone to smash. Or your purse, or your purse has been grabbed by some sneak, Then you show her your big brilliant ring. And the studs, and the studs that you wear, worth a dime. Then you add that her stipend you'll bring-Let it go, let it go, she will say, till next time.-Refrain & Chorus. 
If you go out to lunch with a friend. When you take, when you take up the bill of the fare, He will think you have money to lend, If you put, if you put on a distingue air; He will think that the next time you dine 'Twill be you, 'twill be you that will square op the bill; He will order the best of good wine, And your drink, And your drink and your food cost you all.-Ref. & Chorus, 
If your clothes have got rubbed at the seams, And you know, and you know it is time for a suit; There is one of the simplest of schemes For free clothes, for free clothes and free linen to boot. Tell your tailor you're in with the boys, And your crowd, and your crowd has got plenty of tin; As a show card your form he employs, While you talk, while you talk and then run the boys in.-Refrain & Chorus. 
Now your room and your wash and your lunch And your drinks, and your drinks and your clothes are all free; If you smoke, choose a brand, take a bunch, And then talk, and then talk to each smoker you see. Free cigars and free shoes, and the terms, Are as ea-, are as easy as easy can be, Nor the fish, nor the brutes, nor the worms, Nor the birds get as much *F. O. D., don't you see?-Refrain & Chorus. 
If you wish your expenses-to cut, You must get, you must get one of Atkinson's lamps; 
Then of beef buy a small Western butt; Let it stew, let it stew till your stomach has cramps; When you're hungry and ready to faint, You will bear, you will bear any food you can get-A shinbone, though 'tis chock full of taint, When it's stewed, when it's stewed is a tidbit, you bet.-Refrain & Chorus Just to live in this world is no fun; We've a right, we've a right to some pleasure in life; And good food we consider as one; For a cook, for a cook have a neat little wife, When our food is all cooked in a stew; On the floor, on the floor "twill the cheaper to sleep When our clothes are worn out, no more new, What's the need, what's the need when no clothes are so cheap?-Ref. & Cho. 
There's a class of young men round about, And the girls, and the girls are fast learning the trick; What they need, 'tis their patents must shout, To a job, to a job, no, they never will stick: And Some men when they're married, just think, If they earn, if they earn just enough for car fare, That their wives must find victuals and drink; What's the wife's is the man's, and, of course, she must share.-Ref- & Cho.